LA’s Top Normcore Restaurants of the 2000s
My current micro-obsession this week is hating on this stupid clickbaity article title from Eater LA:
Now that I’ve gotten that out of the way, I’ve been thinking about the possible normcore restaurants that this article is alluding to. Here are the top 5 closest to my heart:
5. Hamburger Hamlet (Agoura Hills)
Hamburger Hamlet was a national burger chain that opened up its first location on the Sunset Strip in 1950. It offered burgers with such exotic toppings as “bacon” and “guacamole” and featured sultry red booths that I wonder if Red Robin took inspiration from. By the time its Agoura Hills location opened up, I imagine its growth was at its peak and that it was all downhill from there. I have fond memories of playing hangman there with my sister on the kids menu and it was where I discovered my love of ranch dressing. I don’t remember what their burgers tasted like but I’m sure they were pretty good and probably came medium when you asked for medium rare sometimes. I also have a newfound appreciation for Eater LA editor Matthew Kang who co-authored the normcore article after finding out that he archives menus from LA restaurants long far gone.
4. The Cheesecake Factory (Beverly Hills)
The Happiest Place on Earth.
This is the OG Cheesecake Factory location, ushering in the “80’s” (1975-1995) with offerings of unabashed indulgence for all walks of race and class. Any Cheesecake Factory connoisseur knows that not all Cheesecake Factories are created equal, and this was the special Cheesecake Factory – the one my parents would drive with me from Agoura to late at night because their warm apple crisp was that much better. It was the Cheesecake Factory I was allowed to get the Grilled Pork Chop at, perhaps because here it could be trusted. From trusted sources I hear it’s not as good as it used to be. Alas.
I did in fact often eat this as a child at 11 pm.
3. Kate Mantilini (Beverly Hills)
Eater LA (look at her *sighhh)
Laurel Grill (subject of the aforementioned normcore article) is clearly in conversation with Houston’s and The Grill in the Alley, but of course I couldn’t help thinking about Kate’s. Also founded by the owners of Hamburger Hamlet, Kate Mantilini was a Hollywood hotspot known for power lunches and being featured in Michael Mann’s Heat (1995). I remember they had an Andre the Giant “Obey” print in or adjacent to the men’s bathroom and that they had a platonic ideal of a chicken pot pie. We were nobodies, so we couldn’t get a table here often. It closed in 2014 and its art deco facade still stands vacant to this day, primed for a comeback if it weren’t for a stingy, greedy landlord I imagine. Hopefully not as a wildly expensive “family style” restaurant that “pays homage to the space.”
So many lunching ladies.
Such a fantasy.
Seriously what’s going on with the landlord here? Is there more to the story?
2. Moustache Cafe (Westwood)
Wherever you are Anne, I hope you’re well.
The OG Moustache Cafe opened on Melrose, so naturally the Westwood location was the normcore one. It was less “normcore” and really just a good French bistro though. They would make you whatever you asked for, even if it wasn’t quite on the menu. They had incredible chocolate soufflés made to order. And its former employees have a Facebook group available to the public.
Couscous Royale.
I can’t overstate how incredible this was. Soufflés are coming back: I guarantee it.
Maybe when we talk about “normcore restaurants from the 2000s,” what we really long for is a sense of warmth and intimacy from restaurants that translates into their environment as well as their food. This is the journey that Diner Theory has so heroically taken on. I‘ll inhale a BBQ chicken pizza from CPK just like the next guy, but let’s be real: a giant corporate chain can never scratch that itch. Also it was like, never that good? Sue me.
I don’t remember these guys but they still seem familiar.
1. The Cheesecake Factory (Woodland Hills)
This was it!
This was the Cheesecake Factory at its prime. Located in an office building/hotel complex across the street from a strip mall, it had valet parking for your convenience. Upon walking in, you’d see a concrete courtyard through the widows out back, and the courtyard contained a tennis court in a recessed stadium with seats that was somehow always empty and just open to the public. It was where I drank so much water one time for some reason that I threw up. It was where my parents witnessed someone have a heart attack and die. The vibes were crazy for sure, but it was far superior than the Cheesecake Factory at the TO Mall and only a teeny bit further away from Agoura, so it was the Cheesecake Factory where we most often ended up. It was also home to some of my fondest restaurant memories: my dad’s company party at comically long table, my first taste of an avocado egg roll, the anguish and restlessness of waiting too long for a table and the sweet relief that finally comes with the buzzer coming to life in your hands. It’s simply one of the places I had the immense privilege to learn to love restaurants, and I know I’m not alone in that. Its location moved to the Topanga Mall during Westfield’s revamping of it in the mid 00’s. For me at least, it will never be the same.
I fucking love you so much
